redarm | OVERFLOW LOG

[...! ]

You mean smash something then have the store send it to him?

Can we do that?

[Please yes please yes, oh man he hopes there's no policy against that]

I don't see why we couldn't. [And it looks as though Dante's just as pleased with the idea as Noah is.] After all, they don't know why we're shattering it, right?

Or if they won't let us send the shattered one, we could always take it over to the Retrospec building ourselves and leave it for Jim. Either way, we guarantee he gets a broken set.

[Oh. Oh yes. Noah likes this. Noah likes this idea a lot. So much that he'll actually smile. Sure, it's a creepy evil smile. But it counts]

Fuck yes. Let's do it.

[...yeah, that is a creepy smile, Noah. Don't do that again.

Regardless, Dante leads the way to one of the small kiosks around the store, pulling up all the registry lists they have currently. And sure enough, even though it's been impossible to find anything about him in the town... there's an entry for HOLLOWAY, JIM.

Dante frowns, scrolling through all the entries.]

Greedy, isn't he? Look at all this shit he wants.

[NO PROMISES.

He looks over Dante's shoulder at the kiosk, making a face as he scrolls through]

Ugh, seriously, what an arsehole.

See if you can filter it to glassware, that'll break the best.

It doesn't filter like that.

[At least, he doesn't think it does? But whatever, there are at least divisions by department, so he can go into the Home Goods section...]

Oh, man. Noah, look.

[A set of four kate spade new york toasting flutes for fifty bucks (alongside the Vera Wang flutes at $75 for one... man, Jim's fleecing them for all they're worth, isn't he?). "100% glass," the description reads.]

Think that'll do it?

[He stands up on his tiptoes to see more clearly and-

Yep. That is a big grin on his face.]

Yeah, those are perfect. Their shards will sparkle so well.

Split the bill 50/50?

[Sure these aren't cheap even if they aren't the Vera Wangs -- what the hell Jim -- but it's fully worth the price ok]

Works for me.

[Dante's not even going to bother indicating on the registry that the glasses have been purchased. If anyone else gets the same idea they have, he's sure not going to stop them!]

All right, let's find these glasses.

Think we should deliver them to the Retrospec building ourselves so the store can't replace them with unbroken ones?

Okay!

[Back to the kitchen and glassware aisles we go!]

Yeah, probably. Ohhh! We could even giftwrap it! Make it seem like we give a shit!

That's exactly what I was thinking. Places like these always have some sort of gift wrapping they can do, right?

[A-ha, there they are! Dante reaches up to grab a set of the champagne glasses off the shelf, holding them up for Noah's approval.]

Easy enough. Did you find what you needed too, or do we need to go back?

Yeah, right!

[He nods and give a thumbs up at the champagne glasses. Approved!]

Hmmm...lemme run back and check should be just five minutes. I'll meet you by the gift wrapping section?

Fine by me. I'll meet you there.

[And so while Noah's looking, Dante's just going to go ahead and pay for their glasses! Noah can pay him back later or something, he doesn't care.

And so in about five minutes he'll be waiting at the kiosk in question! This is a fancy place, if they're offering that service in July. Christmas has come early!]

Okay! Be right over.

[It takes five minutes for him to grab the stuff he needs - a few utensils, pans, pots - and just to treat himself, a mug with Tokunaga on it. Because fuck yeah.

But when he's done with that, he heads over to the kiosk and approaches Dante]

Oy, I'm back. Find any good wrapping paper yet?

[Dante's lingering around the different samples of paper when Noah arrives.]

Yeah, I think so. What about this?

[It's silver and almost holographic, the way it shimmers when it catches the light. It's not branded with any specific holiday or birthday declarations; just a plain silver wrapping paper that demands to be looked at.]

They've got silver ribbon too, unless you want a different color.

[He'll look over at the paper, immediately admiring it because hey guess who loves gray and silver?]

Oh it's shiny! I like it!

[Shiny of course means it's amazing. But even with his love of the colour, he'll shake his head a little]

Nah, go with gold ribbon. It'll add some contrast.

All right, gold it is.

[He gives their requests to the girl in charge of the gift wrapping station, and before long, they've got a box of beautifully wrapped champagne flutes!

Dante holds the box up for Noah's inspection, grinning.]

Perfect.

[She's even given them a matching gift tag to attach to the box if they'd like!]

[Noah claps his hands together as he holds it up, clearly approving]

Aha, it's like Christmas come early!

And now to deliver it. It's time to pay our friends at Retrospec a visit.

[This is gonna be good. Dante turns away from the gift-wrapping counter, leaning in just enough to be sure that Noah can hear him as he drops his voice.]

We'll smash the glasses there.

[Noah just cackles in response. This is a very good day. ]

[It's not a far drive to the Retrospec building from the Towers--really, finding parking takes up more time, in Dante's opinion. But soon enough the two of them are there in front of the building, the package tucked under Dante's arm. He turns to face Noah, holding it out toward him.]

All right, we'll do it together. Ready?

[Count it down!]

[Noah followed along, actually looking forward to this little venture. When Dante holdes out the box, he'll reach out to help hold onto it with his own hands]

Yeah, ready.

Three...two...one...!

[Dante throws the box to the ground, feeling Noah's movements alongside his own, giving further push to the box. It hits at an angle, the contents shattering with a sharp sound of breaking glass. Even without touching the box, Dante can visualize the contents in shards, jagged and sharp and ready for whoever decides to dig into the box without looking.

He reaches down, picking the box back up, and gives it a shake, smirking at the sounds of all the glass scraping around inside.]

Yeah, I'd say that should do it.

[The sound of the breaking glass is just music to Noah's ears. He can just imagine that asshole Jim opening it up and seeing the shards- maybe even getting cut by some]

Yeah, so let's leave it in there and get outta here.

[Honestly, it's no problem getting in and leaving the box: the door is unlocked this month, and it's easy enough to just place it on the receptionist's desk. A quick in-and-out job for two boys who (for once!) have no ulterior motives. As they come out, Dante looks very pleased with their job well done.]

Hopefully Jim enjoys his present.

[Noah follows along, trying not too hard to hide the bigass smirk on his face]

Oh, I'm sure he will.

[Mission Accomplished]

OVERFLOW LOG

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THAT ICON LMAO

JUST FOR YOU ABI

i'm laughing it's so great

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